part of the universe’s inherent cruelty that all the parts of being a grownup that you idolized as a kid are both the best and worst parts of adulthood
balance in all things etc etc but this is mostly to say that whenever ur feeling rly down about how hard growing up and having responsibilities is, it’s worth trying to remember that your 6 year old self would be so excited about this. you gotta let that optimistic little motherfucker have a voice in your head, even if that voice mostly tells you to buy gushers when you’re in the middle of grocery shopping
elizabethgoudge asked:
Where did the whopping huge meteor come down? I assume if there are core samples, we know where it was, and maybe there are remnants of it?
Chicxulub Puerto, Yucatan, Mexico, fucking exactly
also the people of Chicxulub Puerto are fully aware of this, and even created a memorial for all of dinosaurkind on their own dime!
and personally, I think this single heartfelt block of concrete is more fitting than any number of sleek expensive monoliths in the world’s best museums.
at an unremarkable time in this unremarkable place, the world ended, once. it’s good to remember that.
Oh…man…
I thought this had the vibe of a 90s/00s email forward, which means it has the vibe of a mid-00s Myspace warning, which means it has the vibe of a bit of 80s faxlore, which means it has the vibe of a stern warning in a manners/advice column before that, etc., and sure enough looking it up this warning did hit the internet as a early 00s email forward and has spread in a long unbroken chain until it hit TikTok lol
Will they never catch this dastardly perfume kidnapper…when will his consistent rate of zero kidnappings a year be enough…
so how the fuck are they staying awake then?
#a stranger in a full biohazard suit asked me to smell him and next thing i know i’m down a kidney
My fave part of this urban legend isn’t just that it’s ancient but that the early versions at least contained some explanation for why the kidnapper wasn’t passing out (the drugged perfume was in a bottle) but now it’s just. Watch out for the kidnapper who has drugged perfume that’ll knock you out if you sniff it once, but not if you smell it all day and have it on your skin and clothes
Just like the Halloween candy urban legend, there is a real case here: a woman in Alabama who claimed that in 1999 she was drugged with cologne, and that not only was she robbed, but her employer lost money to. But her story was never proven: nobody ever identified a substance that could do that, her toxicology report came back negative, and her story contained weird bits of illogic like how she was robbed entering a bank. There’s speculation she made up the story as cover for pocketing her employer’s money herself but nothing was ever proven either way
I can’t find out, though, whether the urban legend was inspired by her case or if she was using the urban legend as cover, like in the poisoned Halloween candy case.
(via quasi-normalcy)
Henryk Płóciennik (Polish, 1933-2020, b. Łódź, Poland) - Blue Garden, 1973, Paintings: Oil on Canvas
(via rednines)
This picture is going around Facebook and that’s my thumb back when I could wear nail polish. Also alot of people talk shit on crimethinc but share crimethinc stuff without knowing it…
(via rednines)
Basic rules for analysing fiction, an incomprehensive list jotted down in a hurry:
- The protagonist isn’t always right
- The protagonist isn’t always good
- The protagonist isn’t always written to be relatable or likeable
- The narrator isn’t always right
- The narrator isn’t always good
- The narrator isn’t always telling the truth
- The narrator isn’t always the author
- The protagonist’s moral compass, the narrator’s moral compass and the author’s moral compass are three entirely different things that only occasionally overlap
- Pay attention to what characters do and not just what they say
- Pay special attention when what the characters do is at odds with what they say
- A lot of the time the curtains are blue for a reason. If they aren’t, you should read better books
(via ephemeralhorror)
His channel on YouTube also highlights other home growers:
Very cool, down to earth channel. I love his vibe.
He also did a challenge a little while back to see if he could truly live “self-sufficient” off his homestead for a full month. He emphasized throughout the entire video he made about it that he literally could not have survived it without the aid of friends and community. He busted the “self-sufficient homestead” myth to pieces, and it was so rad.
His work totally upgraded how I approach gardening and personal sustainability, and I really want to read both of his books!
(via hater-of-terfs)
Your reaction to chatGPT instantly lets me know how easy it would be to trick you into thinking that you are haunted
“omg it’s literally alive!” Two beers, 45 minutes, deck of tarot cards, and I’m charging you 350$ for an exorcism.
“I read an article that it’s showing simple self-awareness” two days, mild preparation, hot and cold reading, I can get 60$ for joints laced with sacred sage
“It’s a multi-stage neural network we really shouldn’t be calling an expert system an AI just yet” Ninety minutes, two glasses of wine, I can convince you to pay for dinner.
(via athelind)
I wanna write a Hob/Dream fic except it’s Dream being like “now we shall have sex” and Hob is like “wait for real” and Dream is like “why would it not be for real” and Hob is like “okay but like imaginary dream sex or like here in my bed right now, what are we talking” and Dream is like “firstly. dream sex is real sex. secondly yeah here on your bed in the waking world, what is confusing” and Hob is like “…like anal sex?” and Dream is like “…if you like? this seems more distressing to you than I anticipated?” Hob is like “well ever since I found out you’re the King of Dreams (which was NOT my guess for what your deal was btw fyi) I sorta assumed you…didn’t? have the parts?” and Dream is like “the parts?” and Hob has no fucking idea if this. this. being. if he has a penis and balls and or a vagina and or a butthole or like what, is like the deal. what’s up down there. metaphysically speaking. “does your kind have sex to reproduce?” and Dream is like “sometimes yes but usually no” and then Hob is like “do you need to eat food to live” and Dream is like *SCOFF* really scoffily because he is a dick, and Hob, losing his mind, is like “okay then you see my confusion because, and I’ll be crude here, why do you even need genitals or an asshole” and Dream, horny, is like “FOR SEX”
They get pretty close to having sex but then Hob is like “okay but if you have urethra, do you also have kidneys? do you need kidneys? you’re the creator and creation of humanity’s collective subconscious, right? can you get a kidney stone??” and Dream, who hasn’t fucked in a thousand years by the way and was really looking forward to doing so, is like “I get a kidney stone if I desire to have a kidney stone” and Hob is like “somehow that’s more confusing”
Hob is at last ready, he’s like “okay, great, cool, I’m ready. do we need a condom” and Dream is like “do you think a condom could possibly protect you” and Hob is like “I DON’T KNOW. I DON’T UNDERSTAND YOUR ANATOMY. AND I DON’T LIKE HOW YOU PHRASED THAT”
(via athelind)
Still obsessed with Arthur Conan Doyle’s letter to Bram Stoker gushing about how wonderful a book Dracula is, but particularly how it makes such a good template for leaving fic comments, so I’m gonna to a BREAKDOWN:
- Just say you loved reading it - “I am sure that you will not think it an impertinence if I write to tell you how very much I have enjoyed reading Dracula.”
- Comment on a detail of the craft or structure that impressed you - “It is really wonderful how with so much exciting interest over so long a book there is never an anticlimax.“
- Comment on how it emotionally affected you - “It holds you from the very start and grows more and more engrossing until it is quite painfully vivid.”
- SHARE YOUR BLORBO FEELINGS - “The old Professor is most excellent and so are the two girls.”
- Show appreciation for them as an author - “I congratulate you with all my heart for having written so fine a book.”
Next time you don’t know what to say on a fic you enjoyed, just use the ACD method~
(via athelind)
We need like “unclench your jaw” posts but for eye strain. Like
Go look at something 20ft away for 20 seconds.
take off your glasses if you wear them for 20 seconds
Recommended by my optometrist
Look at something 20 feet away, then 10, then 5, then one, then if you can your nose.
Repeat twice, then again without glasses.
Face forward look out of the corner of your eye. As far as you can look. Slowly move to the other corner. Repeat twice.
Look down as far as you can. Slowly look up. Repeat twice.
Roll eyes twice.
Close eyes for five minutes.
I do this every day usually at my halfway point. My migraines went away. My vision go better. Honestly stretching my eyes as she put it feels great too.
As someone who basically stares at screens all day for work and fun, I should remember this.
(via athelind)
how is the word “cellphone” pronounced
chel-po-ne (CORRECT and GOOD answer)
kaey-poen (WRONG and BAD answer)
something else (????????)
see results
was originally gonna go with “dog” but decided to go for a longer word with more “reasonable” mispronunciations instead, but that ended up backfiring and now like half the people on this post think i actually pronounce it like this. guess you could say it was a bit of a. a b. it was a
it was a bit of a self-own
READING COMPREHENSION QUESTIONS
- why might op have said that she wanted to choose a word with “more ‘reasonable’ mispronounciations”? what could the quotes around “reasonable” indicate? why did she say mispronunciations instead of pronounciations?
- op writes that the post “backfired” and now “half the people on this post think i actually pronounce it like this.” what might the word “backfired” mean in this context?
- what words could “self-own” sound similar to, and how could that relate to the rest of the post?
(via closet-keys)
There’s a teaching in Judaism that one should carry two notes, one in each pocket. One should say “I am but dust and ashes,” and the other should say “the whole world was created for me.” They are seen as opposites; you check one when you’re feeling down on yourself and the other when you’re feeling especially full of yourself. The idea is to maintain balance, but I think the way to achieve full harmony is to realize how they are saying the same thing.
That’s why I have imagined them as a carbon atom. Carbon is a main component of dust (and ashes), but also one of the main building blocks of life. Carbon simultaneously encompasses all. It’s in us, it’s in the stars, the planets, the trees. We are built to exist, yet we are also the building blocks of existence. If we keep both in mind, we can live in balance all the time.
(via roach-works)










